Day 3 of Staying Topical

Day 3 of staying topical...Now I know why it's so hard to be CNN. You have to do a lot of reading and stuff. Anywho...

The Vatican issued new rules to make it easier to discipline priests for sex abuse cases. The discipline involves a spanking behind closed doors done by an alter-boy of their choosing.

John Daly hit the British Open with lavender paisley pants, a peach shirt, and a blue sweater, what he describes as “good luck start pants,” as in “good luck getting laid.” They provide good luck as every other player is too distracted to hit well. To increase his good luck, Daly plans to also wear a bedazzled headdress and clown makeup.

The Norwegian Epic, the 200 foot tall cruise ship, boasts 19 decks, three water slides, the ability to host 4,200 guests, is worth $1 billion…And is shaped like a middle finger for homeless people everywhere. James Cameron is already planning his sequel to Titanic.

The ship also offers three amusement park-quality water slides, a full-sized basketball court, batting cage, 33-foot-high climbing wall, spa, and Fitness Center. So you can do all the things you’ve wanted to do with the added benefit of sea sickness.

A Nestle SA subsidiary has agreed to drop advertising claims that its children’s drink, "BOOST Kid Essentials" prevents colds and flu. They added, “We’re not, however, taking back our statement that our candy bars can beat chicken pox and super villains.”